lifeless

i don't really know what had happened to me, recently. i feel like avoiding. i feel like staying away. i feel like i can't stand everyone. i feel that i'm better off alone which i don't, truthfully, at times. and those things, the assignments and all, it just come in handy when i wanted to be alone. it keeps me to what i want. i just wanna stay in this room. away from the world. it's like nothing seems to excite me, outside. only to annoy me, to create rage or to bore me to death. even home, KL didn't really excite me anymore. everything feels wrong, to me. and i don't even know what i want to do, with myself and with other people.

but it seems to be unfair to others. it seems harsh and i know many of them are somehow irritated or unhappy with my behavior. it's not something that i wanted. but i can't beat the fact that i umm. it's fine. maybe i was being emotional over i don't even know what. yes, i don't even know the reason why i'm being like this. and the truth is, it's already been a while. maybe like my brother used to say, "tired. i'm just tired. tired of everything." but he applied it on other matter. i do too, feel tired. tired of everything that's around me. but others would think i'm just being annoying and emotional and isolating myself.

and so, i'm just gonna say here that i'm sorry. for anyone who's affected by my inconvenient behavior. let me just be with myself for a while. i need to think over what actually make me this way. again, sorry.



“I can’t say it’s okay right now. When this bus returns to its place, then it’ll become okay. When I get off this bus, I’m going to return to being the happy Jeremy. Forget everything I said here. If you don’t forget them, I can’t return. Got it, Go Mi-nam?” 


- jeremy (you're beautiful)





like the quote above, you all gonna see my happy self again or at least i'll try to be. so just forget this post. okay?




fin



p/s : tired. headache. bored. lifeless.