Sunday, April 17, 2011


i guess it's not something that is easy to do, right? 
to say that you love someone, directly, face to face, is very complicated and painful, isn't it? 
to express it with all your might that you love that person, that you have been loving that person wholeheartedly even you yourself did not realize when exactly you started to like that one person, is definitely a difficult task. 
to even notice that you really like that person, until someone tells you that you do.
 to do anything to hide your feelings so long that you would not have to confess. 
to get caught that you love that person, by that person himself or herself or even by other people. 
it is all so painful. 
to just watch that person but you can do nothing.
it's so near that you can almost touch it.
but you cant. 
that person is getting away, but you can do nothing about it.
or manage to grab that person but it doesn't last that long.
that person slips away.
that you are willing to do anything for that one person, to sacrifice even to the most impossible thing, with impossible outcome. 
even to the extent of exchanging your life for the sake of that person to live forever, to see that person live his/her life happily. 
to think that it's the best way to confess. 
to let that person be happy with someone else as you think that's the best way to convey your message.
rather to endure it as friends just to not feel ashame or fear of not getting the right answer. 
to just keep it to yourself, seeing through the shadow, far from the eyesight, since courage doesn't want to play its role properly. 
to be threaten, to be torture just for a confess to be heard. 
it's not just a word play. 
honesty, from the bottom of our heart it shall be. 
to convey the message and hoping that it would not be just a wishful thinking. 
to hope that it will be accepted dearly. 
to hope that it will not be rejected with shame and disorderly. 
the silent death of embarrassment would also be clinging before, during and after a confession. 
the outcome that could differ from the eyes of the confessor. 
but the affections, induce a person to gain the courage to spell the love to that person. 
that courage, isn't something that every human can have, that is, if it is for true, real love.
some could be shameless enough to confess. 
some may be otherwise. 
even wonder how people could do it so slyly.
maybe it's the love.
some could just bury it in their hearts and minds, might as well just throw it away. 
avoiding the unreasonableness of confess and its ending.
though love keeps you wonder about everything.
to explore deeply on that person you love.
trying to decipher that person you like but you still cant get it through with naked eyes. 
even the simplest, most unseen to others, could be seen but not knowing how it stuck it your mind. 
that person manage to make you wonder, even to the weirdest thoughts.
make you find a way to say it to that person but you cant.
 though sometimes you thought that that person should do it first, express it to you.
ego has always been the greatest friend with love and confessing.
to let go the foolish pride is like to peel the skin of the flesh.
but confess is still like its usual.
but the courage to spill it is always different.
forever it would be like this, stick like this, unchangeable.
confess is the last thing you wanna do. 
it shall be a secret, forever it will, your love to that person, that is.


p/s : sorry for the crap. it's just that it makes me wonder how people confess. 

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